We firmly believe that sin and decay are destroying our world and inhibiting each and every one of us from living the way God intended us to live. We have all in a sense, been infected by a disease that has tainted our entire lives, even at levels we aren’t even aware of. In particular, we have witnessed how this current generation is being heavily attacked in regard to sexual sin & body image. We hope that the following information will help liberate you from the decay of these sins and help you to experience free, full, abundant life.
Breaking Free
Body Image & Eating Disorders
One of the ways that many of us us are being attacked is in and through our body image/self-esteem. Especially for women, society is constantly shoving down your throat that your value and worth are based on your body type and your hip-to-waist ration, and unless your panty size is small enough or your bra size is big enoug
h, you aren’t desirable in any way. Whether you recognize it or not, those messages, and the degree that you buy into them, drastically impacts how you feel about yourself and the world. The primary means by which these negative views of our bodies manifests themselves is through eating disorders.
Many people believe that by drastically controlling and altering the way we consume food, they can somehow obtain the body and the results they so desperately desire. as was the case with porn and sexual sin, seeking to satisfy our desires in that way only leads to immense pain, anguish, and frustration. But, victory and release are available to you and the pain you are experiencing can be overcome (Philippians 4:13).
What is an Eating Disorder?
An eating disorder occurs when a person’s life revolves around weight and food.
- Some people eat too little. This is called restrictive eating.
- Some people eat too much at one time. This is called binge eating.
- Some people purge. They vomit, use laxatives, fast or excessively exercise to get rid of the food they eat.
- Some people exercise to excess (more than an hour a day). They are compulsive about exercise and feel significant distress if they are unable to exercise, even for one day.
For detailed information regarding each type of eating disorder, click on the links below:
Excerpt from “Life Inside the ‘Thin’ Cage” by Constance Rhodes:
“I’m Not Hurting Anyone…”
For many years there wasn’t much anyone could say to veer me away from my tried and true technique of chronic dieting. In my mind, gaining weight was simply not acceptable, and so the means by which I remained so incredibly thin seemed a small price to pay for my perceived success.
It wasn’t until the day I nearly passed out while trying to mow my tiny front lawn that I finally got frustrated with what I had become. I talk about this more in my book, but it was that event that finally got me mad, which was actually an important step toward getting help.
For some reason, it took me 12 years to realize that my eating habits had indeed been destructive to my body. Up to this point, I had convinced myself that I was not hurting anything, or anyone, but as I began to step back a little, I started to understand that there had been several “hidden costs” along the way.
Things like skipping social events, out of fear that I would eat something “off limits”. Or missing out on building friendships, as my obsession seemed to consume my time and cause others to keep their distance. As I started taking a closer look at my life, I saw hundreds of price tags, both small and great, that had been stacking up along the way.
And so I realized that there were actually some pretty compelling reasons to give up my unhealthy obsession with thinness.
If you think you might struggle in this area, please seek out the advice of someone you trust.
One of the best websites we have found that can provide you with the resources and strategies you need to overcome this struggle is findingbalance.com. This site is a trusted Christian resource that specializes in this area and is invaluable if you are looking for help.
Don’t ever hesitate to e-mail, call or come by our office so we can partner with you in finding freedom and liberation.
*As seen on Baylor University’s Counseling Website http://www.baylor.edu/counseling_center/baretruth
Alcohol & Drug Abuse
Contrary to what you’ve probably heard about college, you don’t have to get liquored up or high every night in order to have a memorable experience. In fact, you’ll have many more memories of your years of higher education if 
drinking and drug use isn’t a central part of it. So don’t let college folklore influence you to be under the influence.
Here are a few sobering statistics on how drinking too much, too often can put a serious damper on your dreams of achieving academic glory–or even your dreams of just graduating:
- According to the Core Institute, an organization that surveys college drinking practices, 300,000 of today’s college students will eventually die of alcohol-related causes such as drunk driving accidents
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159,000 of today’s first- year college students will drop out of school next year for alcohol- or other drug-related reasons. The average student spends about $900 on alcohol each year. Do you want to know how much cash the average student drops on his or her books? About $450.
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Almost one-third of college students admit to having missed at least one class because of their alcohol or drug use, and nearly one-quarter of students report bombing a test or project because of the aftereffects of drinking or doing drugs.
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One night of heavy drinking can impair your ability to think abstractly for up to 30 days, limiting your ability to relate textbook reading to what your professor says, or to think through a volleyball play.
Although these statistics might be true, they still don’t do much to curb our habits or motivate us to stop drinking. But, what will?
When it comes to Christians and alcohol in particular, most of us are accustomed to hearing the same thing: drinking is from the devil (combined with a judmental look and a finger pointed at your face)! And although we believe alcoholism and the misuse of alcohol by those in college is incredibly destructive, more needs to be said on the topic than simply “Drink and you’ll find yourself in Hell!”
In I Corinthians 10, we read the following – “‘Everything is permissible’—but not everything is beneficial. ‘Everything is permissible’—but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.” In these two verses we are presented with one of the strongest reasons for severly limiting, if not altogether putting an end to your drinking. Although it is not a sin (against the will of God) to have a drink (Jesus turned water into wine at a wedding) the question becomes how beneficial and constructive is this behavior? As the verse above points out, and as the gospel makes clear, as a Christian you no longer live for yourself. You were bought by Christ to be used for Christ. And a common theme throughout Scripture is that while drinking is not always viewed as wrong, its dangers and harmfulness were such as to call forth numerous warnings. In some cases (priestly service, Nazirite vow, Timothy’s apostolic efforts) abstinence was seen as commendable and appropriate.
Proverbs 23 – “Do not look at wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup and goes down smoothly. At the last it bites like a serpent, and stings like an adder. Your eyes will see strange things, and your mind utter perverse things.” This verse, along with numerous studies points out that drinking causes you to not operate at 100% of your intellectual ability, it tends to weaken your capacity to make split second decisions, and greatly impacts your moral restraint. Someone who is seeking to be used by God at all times, who is to “always be prepared to give an answer”, whose conversation is to ”always be full of grace and seasoned with salt” , cannot seek to live out these commands and be under the influence of alcohol at the same time. Not drinking is a sacrifice that many of us are called to make, not merely for our own benefit and well being, but equally importantly for the benefit of the world around us – for “the good of others”. Life is about so much more than simply having a good time, relaxing with, and getting your mind of things for a while. It is about always being in tune with God. Always seeking to do His Will. So whether you are the designated driver, the person who is able to stop others from making dumb mistakes, the only one who fully present in any given situation, or one of the few who is willing to make a statement about the negative effects of drinking, the use (and abuse) of alcohol is something that Christians need to take much more seriously.
Where to Go For Help
We believe that God’s power is able to deliver individuals from the compulsion to drink, and to set them free from the emotional, psychological, social, spiritual, and physical consequences of an alcoholic lifestyle. In addition to seeking the Lord through both personal and communal means, the following strategies and techniques should prove to be invaluable as well.-
Enlist the help of family, friends, professors or your Resident Director. Letting someone else know about your struggle and your desire to change is a huge first step. When they hear that you want to try to curb your drinking, we are sure that they will be happy to do whatever they can to help and encourage you.
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Call or e-mail the campus ministry office or the counseling center right away (www.services.pepperdine.edu/counselingcenter) We are here to assist and walk with you as you seek to break free from your dependance and addiction to alcohol or drugs.
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Learn about all of the different resources that are available to you right here around campus. Whether it be peer support groups, accounatiblity partners, etc. you will probably be surprised to learn how many people and organizations there are that can help. One of the best online Christian based resources that we have found is www.celebraterecovery.com.
Pornography and Sexual Sin
What’s The Big Deal?
Porn Runs The World
This world is rife with moral decay. Doubters need only look to the evening news or the vacant church pews for confirmation. That and the fact that the porn industry utterly dominates our society.
Think we’re exaggerating? We’ve got the numbers to back it up. As big as you think porn is, it’s bigger, and its influence on modern society is deeper.
Porn > Hollywood
“Hollywood cranks out around 500 movies a year to an international audience of 2.8 billion. Its closest competitor, India’s Bollywood, makes about 1,000 movies a year, but 50 percent aren’t released and 95 percent of those released are financial flops. This is unfortunate considering every Bollywood clip we’ve ever seen has been absolutely amazing.
In 2008, The Dark Knight alone grossed $533 million domestically and over $1 billion internationally, certifying it in the top five highest grossing films of all time and a crown jewel in the Hollywood empire. It’s just further evidence that the institution of Hollywood cannot possibly be bested in any way, and certainly not by the data in the following paragraph.
As early as 2002, about 11,000 adult movies were released per year–more than 20 times the mainstream movie production. To meet current demand, a new pornographic video is being created every 39 minutes in the U.S.
In 2005, there were approximately 425 films released in Hollywood, including a Star Wars prequel and a Harry Potter movie, with domestic grosses of $8.597 billion. That’s very impressive. In 2006, the cumulative grosses for porn videos in the U.S., leveraging video sales, rentals, mobile phone content and Internet revenues–came out to….
Are you ready?
$8.65 billion.
About the same, and that’s minus the billions Hollywood spends on promotion. Oh, and we’re going to take a wild guess and say that the combined budgets of every porno shot that year wouldn’t even pay for the CGI in the opening credits of a Harry Potter movie. So, yeah, we’re thinking that $8.65 billion is pretty much all profit”.
Porn > Pretty Much Everything
Remember at the beginning when we said as big as you think porn is, it’s actually bigger? We meant it.
Microsoft, purveyor of the operating system used on most of the computers in the world, reported 2008 profits in excess of $16 billion. ExxonMobil, the world’s largest publicly traded company and number five on Forbes’ top 2000 companies, posted 2008 profits of $40.6 billion. Though there is little in common with their industries, they do share one common bond: porn revenues spank them both. 
In 2006, the sum of international revenues from pornographic videos, sexual novelties, magazines, “dance” clubs, pay-per-view and Internet was approximately $97 billion.
Can you even wrap your mind around that number? Try it this way: that’s larger than the combined annual revenues of the NFL, NBA and Major League Baseball.
Still not impressed? Well, our domestic revenues for pornography are larger than the revenues of Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix and EarthLink combined.
This means $3,075.64 is being spent on pornography internationally every second. To put that in perspective, when ExxonMobil posted a quarterly profit of $11.7 billion last year, the largest in American history, they were effectively making $1,947 less per second than the world of filth mongers.
When you start talking about money this big it’s not even fair to compare individual companies, so we just made the jump to entire countries. If you compare porn revenues to Gross Domestic Product, the market value of all final goods and services from a nation in a given year, it is bigger than Morocco”.
Making money is one thing, but making money by preying off of people and causing them immense pain and strife is quite another. Don’t think porn is negatively affecting our world? Keep reading.
* As read on http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/news/pornrunstheworld.html
The Extent and Problems of Pornography
The Extent
It is no secret that the average man looks at pornography much more frequently than the average woman, yet research shows that women are starting to look at porn much more than they had, say, even 5 years ago. So it is safe to say that this is not just a “guys” problem, or even something that only anti-social, sexually frustrated people are dealing with. Whether you are a guy, or a girl, a Christian or an atheist, a virgin or sexually active, porn is something that knows no boundaries and can grab a hole of anyone, regardless f our age, gender, religious beliefs, sexual practices, etc. So take heart, you are not alone if you are struggling with pornography (the numbers are scary as to how many people are in fact struggling with it).
But, what most people underestimate is the immensity of the problem and its effects.
Naming the Problems
In his book The Centerfold Syndrome, Dr. Gary Brooks points out five effects the visual stimulants in our culture and in pornography have on men.
I. Voyeurism
Have you ever walked across Pepperdine’s campus and found yourself unable to stop checking out each attractive woman you pass? Our culture has exploited sexuality so much in advertisements, television, and magazines that it has broken down men’s natural ability to avoid these thoughts. This leads to voyeurism in which men obtain pleasure by looking at women from a distance rather than interacting with them in meaningful relationships.
II. Objectification
There comes a time at which you have looked at women in so many pictures, fantasized about them so frequently, and been tempted so thoroughly, that you are no longer looking at women as people, but as objects of personal gratification. When men objectify women, they look at their bodies but do not see the real person inside.
III. The Need for Validation
Does seeing that your best friend’s girlfriend seems more attractive than your own cause you to feel inadequate? The continual onslaught of pornographic imagery flooding our lives frequently teaches men that they should be dating a certain type of woman with a certain type of look. When men begin to live out this need, they may find they are never satisfied with any woman because they are continually searching for something “better” as a way of validating themselves.
IV. Trophyism
Rather than seeing women as people who are worthy of a genuine relationship, a woman becomes like a trophy on the mantle. The man uses her to show his value to others.
V. Fear of Intimacy
After culture gets done teaching all these other lessons about what men should seek in women, it is no wonder their willingness for intimacy is also compromised. After continual exposure to physical relationships with little
emotional content, the fear of something genuine naturally ensues.
Add to this the great potential for increased aggression, relational devastation, self-esteem issues, etc. it is safe to say that pornography and the effects it has on us is a big deal, a VERY big deal.
* As seen on Baylor University’s Counseling Website http://www.baylor.edu/counseling_center/baretruth
Defeating Pornography
Victory Is Possible
Defeating pornography and sexual sin is no easy task, but it is possible (Philippians 4:13). The first step in defeating the temptation to view pornography is to change your core values and what you think is “real” & “normal”. For instance, men and women have been bombarded and have come to believe that they must “prove themselves” and somehow measure up to a level of sexuality that we see in popular media. Yet, although these understandings of sexuality, as depicted for us in porn and in Hollywood, are completely removed from reality, men and women are trying desperately to measure up to these false ideas of sexuality, and have in fact considered them to be the “standard.” But who gives the guy behind the camera or the editor of a magazine the right to define sexuality and normalcy for us? They are in no position to tell us how we should live our lives. In fact, as we mentioned before, they are simply in it for the money.
Instead of turning to some equally sinful and sexually frustrated person who lives in a fantasy land, we need to turn to God. We need to recognize what God defines as normal and base our actions and attitudes around that. We need to cling to the understanding that Christ is the author and perfector of everything (Hebrews 12:2), including our sexuality, and realize that if we want to learn how to properly express our sexual passions and desires, we simply need to turn to the One who gave them to us. Although we don’t have the space to lay out everything, God’s ultimate desire for us and our sexuality is to bring Him glory, we do that through holiness (Romans 6:22; 2 Corinthians 7:1; Ephesians 4:24; Hebrews 12:10), self-control (Proverbs 25:28; 2 Peter 1:5-7), sacrifice (Ephesians 5:1-3), a recognition of worth & value (Matthew 6:26; Matthew 7:6), and doing things in their proper time and proper way(Song of Solomon 2:7 NLT; Ecclesiastes 3:1). We hope that you will cling to the promise and assurance that “the pure in heart will see God” (Matthew 5:8) more than the empty, fleeting promises of sexual sin.
In addition to changing the way we see and think about porn and sexual sin, different tactics are necessary to break the routine. In order to avoid thinking of pornography and acting out on those thoughts, standards and activities must be set in place to replace it.
Steps to Recovery
In The Sexual Man, Dr. Archibald Hart suggests several steps to assist in breaking out of an obsession with pornography. They are described (and elaborated upon) in some detail below.
I. Destroy the Porn
No matter how insignificant the amount of porn seems, any porn left behind is an open invitation for the pornography habit to return in full force later. Throw away anything and everything that causes you to stumble, i.e. magazines, pictures, movies, etc. & download (or better yet, have a friend download & password protect) accountability software onto you’re your personal computer. Physically removing (and destroying) pornographic objects and setting up barriers is an absolute first step.
II. Change Your Habits
One thing to recognize when it comes to pornography and sexual sin is that most people tend to have very particular patterns and routines that lead to or result in acting out our desires or impulses. Whether our struggles typically happen late at night when everyone else is asleep, or in the afternoon when you are tired and bored, or even when you are angry or frustrated about work, it is important and absolutely crucial that you know what your particular patterns are. If is simply a matter of not sitting in the same seat looking at the same girl, or not walking down certain streets past certain stores, or not being alone during certain times of the day, know what your typical patterns are and then do everything in your power to change those patterns. It might also be necessay to set up certain filters (especially for those who struggle with internet pornography) to stop you from going down a destructive, habitual path. Although there are numerous filter’s avaialbe online, we encourage you to stop by the office where we will install one for free and be able to personaly hold you accountable.
III. Don’t Feed Your Fantasies
Although it is absolutely crucial to do what Job did and set up a “covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl” (Job 31:1), it is also absolutely crucial to set up a covenant with your mind. This goes for both guys and girls. After we see something pornographic, or even just sexual in nature, our minds immediately take over and the fantasies begin. We begin to muse over, daydream about and actually believe that certain things are true when they are not, i.e. “that girl wants me”, “all guys like it when I do this”, etc . A major step in overcoming sexual sin is training your mind to only think about those things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, & admirable (Philippians 4:8). It is not a light or easy thing to “take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ” but that is exactly what we must do to overcome sexual sin.
IV. Be Accountable
As we hinted at before, friends and accountability partners/communities are invaluable in the struggle against pornography. When someone else is holding you accountable for your actions with pornography, you have a much better chance of defeating it, especially if that someone will demand you tell them the truth and has experienced personal victory himself/herself. It is important to meet with and be held accountable by people who have tangible resources and suggestions and who are experiencing freedom themselves. Simply getting together with a bunch of people who are falling deeper and deeper into sexual sin won’t help all that much.
V. Be Patient
It takes time to defeat most addictions. The bad habits and destructive tendencies that we have were not created overnight, and although some people can stop “cold turkey” and put an end to bad habits overnight, there is a very real chance that experiencing victory in this area will take a lot of time. Being convicted over your sin is one thing, but allowing guilt and depression to tear away and destroy the progress you have been making is another. When it comes to overcome pornography, start small. Set realistic goals for yourself, i.e. not looking at pornographic material for a week, or not masturbating for a 5 straight days, etc. and once you realize that you do have the power and ability to meet those goals, set ones that are higher.
VI. Resist Feeling Defeated
Once you stumble it is sometimes hard to get up again which can lead to feelings of frustration and defeat. If you don’t give these feelings any power, you will have a better chance of continuing successfully in the battle. In the movie Batman Begins, Bruce Wayne’s father gives him a classic word of advice that might be helpful. He says, “Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.” What is important in all of this isn’t “if you fall”, but what do you do “when you fall”? Becoming angry and feeling defeated won’t do anything. Instead, confess your mistakes to others (1 John 1:9) and humble ourselves before God, He is faithful to pick us back up and enable us to continue on.
VII. Pray About Your Problem
The fact of the matter is that whether you recognize it or not, the sexual sin in your life is greater than you are (Romans 7:16-18). Sin, especially sexual sin, can control and make us do things that we do not want to do. Although taking the practical steps listed above, can and will aid you in the fight, it is our belief that only the power of God and the grace of the gospel can truly free you from it. He is the only one who can give you a new heart, a new mind, and a new way of living. We encourage you to devote yourself fully to Him, through prayer, study, worship and community. Don’t hide your imperfections from Him or allow embarrassment or shame to keep you from Him. God loves you, even in your weakness he loves you. Even though you are addicted to porn or sexual sin, he loves you. And he wants to free you from its bondage.
Feel free to contact us if you have specific prayer needs or if you want to talk about any of this stuff in person. We are here to help you.